One of the first subjects we run into on our personal development/spiritual paths is meditation. Simple enough. Until we find out that there are all kinds of meditations and everyone has an opinion about which is the best one.
It gets overwhelming pretty fast. Or we waste time trying to find our perfect meditation technique that fits our personality, desires, lifestyle, beliefs etc.
Meditation really is simple. But it deals with the realm ‘just beyond mind’, therefore mind and intellect can get stuck chasing its tail trying to understand it.
It’s one of those things we have to experience first, before we can try to understand and explain/articulate it intellectually.
The first times I heard about meditation I thought it was mystic and mysterious. Something only highly trained monks could do.
Turns out, it’s not. Meditation is a perfectly natural state of being that we all have experienced as some point in our lives. Quietly observing nature is a form of mediation. Sitting and contemplating something pleasant can be a meditation. Enjoying a good song can help put us into a meditative state.
After publishing the last article - how to change negative inner conversations - I received a specific question:
I wonder, how could I do this in the morning to help myself to get out of the bed. This is very hard for me. To get up and start the day!
As it’s something I’ve struggled with myself, I decided to write a separate how-to article.
It’s hard to get up in the morning and start the day when we have nothing to look forward to.
A change of circumstances does not bring about an improved life experience. We can change jobs or relationships, but we bring ourselves with us, and soon the new situation will feel and play out just like the old one did.
Without changing our mood and inner conversations, our actions will not produce the desired changes and results. The outer world is a reflection of the inner.
One of the best tools that I’ve discovered for changing ourselves is to change our inner conversations.
It is easy to get lost in a forest by only looking down under our feet - careful, there is a root sticking out of the ground, don’t step into the puddle, don’t trip over that tree-stump.
It’s the same story with feeling stuck in life.
Being stuck means dreading getting up in the morning to relive the same day all over again. Work that slowly drains us of energy and leaves us depleted. When the highlight of the day is eating a large meal with a glass of wine and watching TV in the evening. When we have to physically exhaust ourselves for hours in gym just to numb our feelings.
That’s stuck. And it’s a mindset.
Our daily lives can be OK - good enough job, we have friends, we do our best to lead a healthy lifestyle etc. Yet we feel stressed-out and depleted at the end of the day. Or even before noon.
We all have such out of control days. Like we are just along for a ride on a mad rollercoaster.
While other days we are firing on all cylinders all day long and are still full of energy and ready to go in the evening.
Why is that so? And how can we have more of the latter days?
The clue lies in figuring out what makes other days so full of energy and enthusiasm. What is so special about them.
You’ve probably tried countless practices of personal development and spirituality. You’ve read a ton of books. Attended workshops. Spent endless hours in discussions. Tried various tools, approaches, practices to grow spiritually, build better habits and personality, set and reach goals.
All personal development and spirituality in the end boils down to one single question: How Can I Feel Happy Now?!
The lie, delusion or fallacy is in buying into the idea that I need things to be different to feel happy or that by changing something outside (achieve goal) I will feel happy.
Not true. It is a trap. As still the power or focus is on the outside, on something we have no real control over. But we try, we do our best and waste time on yet another wild goose chase.
It’s all a distraction.
When do you feel most alive, happy and energized? When you are focusing upon some desire, something wanted, an improvement, a goal. Something that could or is about to happen and improve your life.
But as soon as it happens, as soon as it is a done deal, a fact - your enjoyment, happiness and energy level drops.
That should tell you something about a recipe for a happy and joyful life.
So why DO we need desires to feel alive?
Have you been wondering - why are you even bothering with all this spiritual or self-help stuff? What do you really hope to achieve? Is it real? Can it be measured? Are there any guarantees? Or is it just a waste of time and energy, a big fat lie?
Have you been devouring spiritual/self-help books recently? Have your interests shifted dramatically? Have you felt a deep longing for something, without ability to articulate even to yourself what it is you seek?
Those are all sign you are on a path of personal transformation. But why, and how can you know if you are ready for it?